Sophomore's Life a Study in Compromise

O'Sullivan wanted to wear his blue shirt, but it was in the wash.

WALSH -- A recent study found the life of Boston College student Kyle O'Sullivan, A&S '14, to be the epitome of compromise.

"The analogy of choosing between a rock and a hard place is expressed no better than in O'Sullivan's melancholy, contradictory existence," said professor Richard Hawkins of the Lawrence Center for Decision-Making.

The panel of experts offered last Tuesday as a recent example of O'Sullivan's less than ideal options. When he got up in the morning, the only thing keeping him going was the hope for a Honey-Q chicken wrap from Corcoran Commons. Unfortunately, upon arrival, O'Sullivan discovered it was not on the menu and instead settled for a Magic Carpet Ride.

That seemed to spiral out of control throughout the week. When O'Sullivan woke to register for classes early Thursday, he was disappointed to find that the one class he really wanted to take, Feminisms, was closed. When his backup option, Peace or War, also filled up, he reluctantly resigned himself to getting Structures of the Universe out of the way.

Things seemed to brighten for O'Sullivan Friday. After receiving a surprise B+ on his history midterm, chatting with his mother for ten minutes, and beating his roommate in Madden '12, he was delighted to receive a text from classmate Melanie Carter, A&S '14, inviting him to a party that evening.

O'Sullivan decided to shower, dress up, and dash on cologne, knowing that Carter's best friend, Katie Thompson, CSOM '14, would be in attendance. The researchers note O'Sullivan's long-term crush for Thompson.

But when he arrived at the party, Thompson was already in the arms of another man. O'Sullivan wandered about for a bit making conversation and halfheartedly sipping on a lukewarm Natural Ice, occasionally glancing over at Thompson. Rallying himself, he struck up conversion with Sophia Pomillo, A&S '15, who was less attractive and not as funny as his true crush.

As he settled down Sunday afternoon to take stock of his life, O'Sullivan flipped on the television hoping to catch the Ravens game, but was instead stuck watching the Bengals.